If we want respect from young people we have to earn it – not try to humiliate them

By Mark Yearsley, headteacher, North Cumbria Technology College

Last updated 16:18, Monday, 26 May 2008

I got in trouble after my last column in Learning. It seems my wife didn’t like my revelations about our early relationship – consequently I was made to sit in the far corner of the room and not spoken to for a couple of hours.

The problem is I neglected to show her the piece I had written and so it was drawn to her attention in the coffee room at work.

As a consequence, I suffered. Ah well, it’s not the first time I have been in trouble for something I have written and I suspect some might find this piece equally challenging.

When I was at school it was normal for corporal punishment to be dealt out on a regular basis. I was given the cane for running the wrong way around the school to get to the dinner queue.

Some teachers spoke with sarcasm and abuse to children; I remember being addressed as ‘Yearsley, you blithering idiot!’

I realise that discipline structures in schools were partly a function of the culture of the time and that society has moved on since then but it sometimes worries me that there are still those who call for a return to the days of proper discipline.

Young people need to learn to respect adults and that the perceived ills of our society can be traced back to a lack of proper discipline.

They often call for a return of National Service for all young people – ‘put ’em all in the Army, that will teach them a lesson’ is the cry, often made with a slightly strange glint in their eye.

As I’m sure you will have guessed I have a slightly different view and it’s one which I have tried to develop in the two schools I have led so far and something I see as crucial to the success of the Richard Rose Central Academy.

It is that young people should be treated with dignity and respect at all times, especially important when they fail to treat adults with respect.

I believe there is never a need to be sarcastic, to humiliate or to bully young people and perhaps most controversially that if as adults we want young people to respect us, there is a sense in which we have to earn it.

Some of you will be thinking that this is just weak minded liberalism but let me try to explain by give you an example.

I occasionally hear staff say of a student ‘this child doesn’t know how to behave’ and that they would like some form of punishment dealt out – 40 lashes or some such presumably!

However, just think about that statement for a moment – I agree the child may not know how to behave – so we need to teach them.

Behaviour is a skill which can be learnt and it should be part of a school’s role to do this.

If a student has difficulty with a maths problem we would help them, give them the skills and confidence and encourage them if they fail again; yet we often treat behaviour differently assuming that young people come to us with all the skills they need. They don’t.

So when a minority of our young people react inappropriately to situations we need to explain patiently where they are wrong, to speak to them quietly and with respect and to work to give them the skills to handle the situation differently next time.

As adults we need to be role models for them, teachers should be well trained, mature professionals whilst many young people are insecure, immature, vulnerable and need our help.

Our young people don’t need to be humiliated, bullied or oppressed by adults; they need help, support and respect so they can develop into well balanced young adults who can make a real contribution to our society.

n Mark Yearsley will become principal of the Richard Rose Central Academy from September